The adventures of Miss Despina

Disclaimer: I’m not responsible for the dinner burning in your oven, you falling asleep, you forgetting to video Emmerdale etc etc. This is a bloody humungous post so I suggest you go to the loo and then grab yourself a nice cup of tea.

Sightseeing in lovely Prague

You know, considering the amount of whinging and angst-ing that’s been going on here recently, you’d be forgiven for thinking that I was a wee bit ungrateful and not having a brilliant time. But actually nothing could be further from the truth! True, the city can be overbearing sometimes, but it is amazing and beautiful and I haven’t seen the half of it yet.

Jez was like a kid with a toy when he came here, and took great photos of breathtaking views. It’s a very photogenic city, and it oozes character. I spent my first couple of weekends getting over the fact that I was here, but to be honest I’ve not had much time to be a tourist as work is tiring and certain parts of Prague must be avoided at the weekend! Vyšehrad is my favourite place so far.

 

This is your hostess up in the Vyšehrad.

Last weekend we went to Petřin Hill and climbed up to the top of the observation tower. It was very windy and I was worried by the swaying at the top of the tower, but I was more worried for my flatmate who is about half my weight. But if there’s a tower there, Despina has to climb it! The walk to the top of the hill was long and my legs ached for days but it was definitely worth it for the 360 degree views.

Despina and Audrey

The next day I took myself into town with the intention of having a Hepburny Day (think Roman Holiday), but just ended up going shopping. Oops. But you see the clothes here are so much cheaper than in the UK. Probably. Although whenever I’m standing there in the midst of a style crisis, in much the same way as some people say, "What would Jesus do?" I ask myself "What would Audrey Hepburn do?". I think what Audrey would have done on Sunday would be to walk out of H and M and buy the equivalent items in YSL, but I hope she will forgive me because I only have a stupid grant to live on! Shopping here is fun!

Prague Culture

What else do I like here? Well, the public transport system actually works. The food and drink is not extortionate. Certain parts of town are given over to tourism now and are enjoyable if you can look at the architecture behind the tat-shops and English pubs, but certain parts, such as where I work, still maintain what I think the Italians would call their "vivabilita" - ie their livability (can’t find the accent, sorry). I can drink pints and it’s ok. The views from the castle are beautiful. The view of the castle is beautiful, especially at night. Walking along the Vltava is not overrated. The red roofs of Prague are best viewed from above, I can only imagine what they’re like when covered in snow.

This place is unpretentious. There is so much culture it is making my head hurt. There is a choice of jazz clubs, four of them are within two minutes of each other. I haven’t been to enough art galleries yet, I’ve been promised a room full of altar pieces in a convent turned gallery, but haven’t got there yet! I haven’t been in enough churches yet either! And I’m reading Milan Kundera and Franz Kafka alternately, in English, admittedly, but I’m still getting a feel for Czech authors which is the important thing I suppose. The unbearable lightness of being was a depressing read, but I enjoyed it, especially the way it described the impact of the 1968 occupation on ordinary people’s everday lives.

Naughty Despina

On the downside, as usual I’ve been enjoying my beer and big meals, and have put on a fair amount of weight since being here. I’ve not yet been swimming or hiking, so all this makes me wonder just how many calories manage to burn in an average week simply due to the amount of sex I have(!) But seriously, you have a porky Despina on your hands at the moment, which is not a good state of affairs. I’ve stopped accepting back massages from Kyne for fear of my love handles getting in the way of our friendship. On the plus side, I supppose I have quite big boobs at the moment though. (If anyone is interested. I’m trying to send my X-rating through the roof!)

In my spare time…

Work is turning out to be quite good fun. I’m getting lazy with my Czech but I am managing to communicate with the non English-speakers now, it’s nice to know that my sense of humour needs little translation! Many of my colleagues are very good fun to be around, and I am genuinely grateful for the amount of English they speak to me. Before we go for lunch, two of my colleagues check the menu online and tell me what does and doesn’t contain pšenice (wheat). I already know but it’s very nice of them- they have also recommended shops where I can buy appropriate flour, for which I am infinitely grateful. I’ve been the only girl in a room not eating pancakes, and I’ll tell you, it ain’t nice!

To sum up, I have more surrogate mothers than I know what to do with. I arrived at work one day to find a pot of homemade strawberry jam on my desk, and the next day to find a home-made dessert, both courtesy of my boss! Last night my colleague Jana took me to meet her family. Her daughter was finishing sixth form and with her friends had organised a performance. This girl is amazing, she can belly dance, play the piano, act, make crafts - Jana has given her children so many chances. The performance was entirely in Czech but I enjoyed the enthusiasm and informal atmosphere. Jana and her family were so welcoming, and then I got the tube home with two lovely girls and managed to speak mostly Czech to them! Also, a CD of me singing in Mikado is doing the rounds, which is really raising my credibility in my colleagues’ eyes. I don’t think they expect a diffident little English librarian to be able to "belt it out" quite like that! I think they’re trying to figure me out now.

My workload is quite patchy and I am often left to my own devices - hence the sporadic posting, and today’s opus! I am now proficient in searching for journal articles in a series of medical databases in a variety of ways, I can place reservations for international library loans, and various other geekeries. However, I’ve been given three long-term projects by the director of the whole library. She is very important and spends a lot of time in the ministry for health here, however she is very welcoming and kind and is genuinely interested in my uni course.

My first project is to provide some background information about UK health libraries, for Czech librarians to read. Thankfully I have some very good contacts in this field, including a university tutor who I get on with very well - should be interesting! (It’s a good thing I actually turned up to my NHS information lectures last year. Of course I’m not going to plagarise the lecture notes!) My second project is to map free medical resources available online. I found them all in my first week here, then accidentally deleted the lot of them (grrrr Czech windows grrr), but they’re all here somewhere! I’ve never mapped resources, but I have a friend who will show me, I think like most things it’s about the fluffy and fine art of Blag! And my third and final project, the one that is causing me much pant-wetting joy, is the proof-reading of the English version of the website. Check it out. I’ve never ever proof-read before and whilst my English is very good, it just feels weird. However, I’ve taken some expert advice, and plan to dive in there and make all the adjustments necessary, to rid the world of "delinquent readers", "slave printers", and "sado-masochistic library assistants with a penchant for role-play". (Ok, maybe I made one of those up.) I mean it’s fun, but it’s a bit boring.

Surreal paragraph

Back at Fawlty Towers, we continue to take the mickey out of family life. I’ve been placed firmly in the role of "mum". Boy One is ignored, fobbed off, and generally treated like he deserves for being the reason why I had to drop out of college and give up me job in the chippy and couldn’t afford to go to Ibiza. Boy Two is my little beta, favoured with love, football shirts, and expensive electrical equipment. Our disfunctional family is completed by Uncle Nob-head (Peter Kay reference, sorry), a good for nothing odd-job man I met in the pub one night, and who may or may not be Boy One’s natural father. All good fun!

Two new girls have moved in and are really friendly and good fun! Magda cooks amazing food, I cook unusual food, and life is ok there, athough the 14 year old tourists going up and down in the lifts, running around above our heads, and perpetually asking where I am from, is pretty annoying. I was chiling in Kyne’s room late last night, when suddenly there were these two Slovakian guys in there with us who our friend had drunkenly invited up. Kyne’s subtle lifts of the eyebrows and shoulders were clearly not working, so I just cut into the middle of what this guy was saying, yelled "na shledanou!" (see you!) and waved byebye!

I leave you with news that the sales are on, so I am going shopping. Big surprise!

Ahoj! Despinová